Queer communities are often small and insular, and once you've found one, you tend to hold on to it for dear life.
So what do you do when you find out your friend, someone you also trusted, starts dating them?
Editor's note: Audrey Irvine is a senior assignment manager for CNN.
They believe this is something everybody knows, that they're just following the rules.
What I've noticed, though, is that every person I've heard espouse this worldview was straight.
Atlanta, Georgia (CNN) -- "Would you be upset if a friend starting dating someone they knew you were once deeply in love with?
" This is the status I was greeted with this week on the Facebook page of one of my dear girlfriends.
Even if you meet someone to whom you think you have no previous connection, a 10-minute conversation almost always reveals that she went to high school with your college roommate, used to be on a volleyball team with that girl from your book club, and had a six-month stand with your favorite barista.
Queers don't tend to expect our dates to come into our lives completely free of prior complication.
My knee-jerk response was "Duh, who wouldn't be pissed?
" Oddly enough, after viewing some of the discussion on the comment thread, I realized that my judgment might have been a little harsh.
Lots of people have told me unequivocally that they would never date a friend's ex.